wonderland

can you
describe to me
what it was?
because i've never felt
more lost.
the friends i have
keep falling and falling
out from under me.
be like a crutch,
but you ask for too much.
and i have these visions
of your eyes
running in my mind.
blink once blink twice
and lie to me
say it's just
not for me to see
but just because
i've done it once
just shut up!

i don't want to be
on the outside
looking in.

but it seems i always am.

call yourself a friend indeed?
i scream at you when i'm in need.
a play on words perhaps i'll be
when you see sorrow painfully.